The very first of October and your mother called...
Sad to remember that as a child this was your favorite season.
You would have begun creating the costume you would wear for Halloween already.
Christmas, Easter, birthdays...
They were all so useless to you.
Ah, but to you, hiding behind a mask, on a day where everyone else would as well, it was pure joy.
It must have been a little bit of a relief to you.
I cannot be sure if this was still your joy in those last couple of years before you...
I am dying to ask.
But who?
And would they really know anyway?
You hid too well those last couple of years...
From me, from them...
I still knew you better.
Strange that it all brought you to where I had been and am once again.
Just a different circle, I suppose.
But I miss you all the same.
And I search for the magic you came with.
I wonder what you would be hiding behind this year?
I mean, if the choice was yours?
You're just a ghost now...
To me, to them...
Everyone remembers you.
Even those I never knew.
You hid too well.
From me, from them...
I knew you.
They knew him.
But I die wanting to know who he was.
Who did you become, the thinking man destroyed by knowing...
... too much?
I miss you...
... too much.











copyright 1997, Amanda Vossler
Used by permission